I’m listening to my orchestral piece “Op. 12 - The Second Ocean in G Major - E6R40” (the last part meaning edition 6, 40th render). To me the piece feels venetian. It opens with a very long sustained high-pitched strings-sections that sound like European majestic festivals. There is a very jazzy, Henry Mancini/Pink Pantherish active, rhythmic, closed hi-hat playing that elevates the festive nature of the piece. And then it goes to highs and lows that are very dramatic, but they feel Pop, kicks and very hard to detect snares come in, they elevate the adrenaline to a high level, a middle section emerges that is a bit more quite, you are a left to breathe, instead of the whole orchestra screaming excitement, you have flutes and piccolos giving you a very slow beautiful melody, while a single solo virtuosic violinist plays something of a Paganini level, hi-hats are back with a bit of tambourine, you breathe and then the orchestra resumes in the highest energy, drama, sound, excitement and adrenaline. (In one version I had church bells singing in the background, they were so cool, but the sound was so saturated you couldn’t hear anything else by this time). It is really like the ending of the second Kung Fu Panda movie where the orchestra is screaming and Pu is fighting the fight with every single hero in his life, everyone is doing their best; violin 1s are going a very rapid staccato pattern, violin 2s are at their slow but over the roof exciting chord progressions, wood winds are repeating the middle melody in the background, the drums are killing it, you have three different drummers all playing their own rhythms, that solo violinist never stops, oboes, clarinets, and the bassoon all play a single note on repeat, and cellos and double basses give a base you don’t even find in synth music. It is perhaps one of the most exciting things I have ever heard in my own life. I always see a river in the city venice, there are people who look like older generations of Swiss. I see those old style buildings, people having █​⁠​‍█⁠​‌​█⁠⁠⁠‍█⁠‍⁠‌ and a home made sandwich and a picnic style of sitting around a very open concert place, with fireworks on the air.

In describing my piece, I hope you have noticed one thing. I do not see it as a function, I do not try to convey meaning. But this music is a mix of things. I have “feelings” for different things, and my piece has a “combined feeling”, a “mixture of feelings”, or if I be the best in describing it: “A Feeling Made Of Other Feelings”. And for the informed reader, I guess you have already seen what happens by this definition.

I have always talked about Sub-Graph Transfer and guardrails and stuff. I always thought of communication as moving a bunch of nodes from you to the receiver, and the language, being a sort of algorithm, a code, an assembly manual so to speak for connecting and constructing the meaning in the mind of the receiver.

Years ago I wrote about how “Maybe The Thought Should Stay In The Mind” ( 28⟡176 ), this was a profound feeling I had that I have concepts, meanings, things in my mind that are destroyed when I put them into the words, when I try to explain them. They are way bigger in my head than what they appear in the conversations. I know instinctively and out of personal experience that there something lost in the abstraction.

This pattern manifested itself in many other places. I could see that for example the Beetles were a bigger meaning than any of their members. There was something about Mac OS X Leopard that never is to happen in the history of humanity. This is my childhood’s concept of “Holistic Harmony”, that the shape of things around each other has a much better meaning that them individually. The thing about a stationary shop that makes everyone fall in love with them and go there even thought they want nothing from those shops, the fact that your one pencil never feels as alive as all of them together in those shops. There is something about curation, about adjacency, about seemingly disparate things that just make a “vibe” around each other. We have no language to explain them, but they make much sense together. My music has no function, it is a mixture of all the feelings that makes it. It is a Pink Panther and venice and festivals and pop orchestras and so much more. We have nothing in any language to explain this, and yet it is a concept, a concept that a piece of art holds in itself.

Reading about the query-agnostic vectors ( 30⟡230 ) this suddenly clicked. We have an embedding space of all ideas, and there is a higher-level machinery (these vectors) that program how we construct them. The thought really does stay in the mind, our mind and our abstraction machinery are really truly two different devices and our understanding of them are as such. Now now I can confidently define art as any form of communication not happening from the abstraction layer. It is the raw movement of nodes with no program installed to explain them. (the spectrum of guardrails installed as said before.)

I can now feel the pieces connecting together in a way I could have never felt before. I feel how my mind is a huge embedding space with holistic harmony governing it, the feeling that I perhaps instinctively knew by eight. This is just too profound. too heavy, too much of a finding for me. It sure feels absurd and strange to explain what it feels to have your eyes open, to see in its most blunt way.

And so I think there is something way bigger than abstraction, something I learned more with than anything in my life, and that is what I’m going to called a Compound Feeling , the set of nodes in a Mind Graph that define just something unique to their combination in the highest fidelity of communication. That is my room without any words to explain anything, that is my relationship with Zea , that is the essence of life. That is the must haman way of understanding and being. That is a unlocking the world behind the gateway of abstraction. It is strange, it is liberating, it is awesome.